Rives: "If I controlled the Internet" (a poem)

How many poets could cram eBay, Friendster and Monster.com into 3-minute poem worthy of a standing ovation? "If I were in charge of the Internet," he says, "You could Mapquest your lover's mood swings / Hang left at cranky / Right at preoccupied / U-turn at silent treatment ..." Enjoy a unique talent.